Small Life, Big God

Our Year In Review...

2011-12-31T09:10:00.000-08:00

This has been another great year for the Croswells! I know that God has great plans for 2012 and I can't wait to see what they are! Today I am reflecting on what has gone on this year, so I thought I would share our year with you.

January-We took the biggest group of students to Winter Weekend and we had a blast! I also started my third semester in college! I was also named the varsity cheer coach for DHS.

February-We enjoyed some of the most beautiful snow that East Texas has ever seen. We also celebrated my 29th birthday and Boomer's 5th birthday.

March-We went on our 3rd annual young adult camping trip (which is always one of the best weeks of the year) and we celebrated Ashby's 3rd birthday.

April-I worked this whole month as a long term substitute teacher for Freshmen World Geography at the high school which I really enjoyed.

May-I finished up the Spring semester with two A's and two B's and I started preparing for cheer camp.

June-I started the summer session at school and began cheer practice. This would mark my last summer classes!!!! That was a huge relief!

July-This is always the busiest month of the year for youth ministry, but it is also the most fun. We went to the Bogg church camp and we brought quite a few first timers with us and were able to grow many friendships that week. Then we spent a week in McAllen, Texas which I think may be the hottest place on earth. We met a kid named Mike who was struggling with who God is and why he needs a relationship with him (remember him because he will show back up in this blog).

August-I started back to school and football season began. The cheerleaders got lots of compliments on how much better they looked than last year which I was very proud of. September-Josh and I celebrated 9 years of marriage and took a trip to Branson. This was the first trip we had taken by ourselves since our honeymoon. Needless to say, we had a great time!

October-We had our Harvest Fest at church and there was a record turnout.

November-We found out that Mike from McAllen got saved!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! This was great for all of our kids to hear because it showed them that mission trips are definitely worth all the work! We had a great Thanksgiving with our family and Josh was able to see his Aunt Dell with his mom and sisters. Josh and I decided that I will not work when I graduate. In a few years I might but for now I will just stay home with Ashby :)

December was another great month. We celebrated another birthday for Jesus and spent lots of time with our family.

To sum it all up, this has been another great year! We have a great family, a great church and God has blessed us in so many ways. I don't know what 2012 has in store, but I hope that I can live the life that God wants me to live and be the example that he wants me to be. I pray that all of you have a great New Year's Eve and a blessed 2012!

Until next year...

Small Life, Big God!

2011-12-29T18:17:00.000-08:00

As this year is nearing an end I am reminded of how awesome our God really is! When I write a post I don't usually look at the title of my blog, but tonight I was looking through some of the new things that have been added to Blogger and I read the title in my head and just focused on it for just a little bit. As I think back over the past 4 years, I realize that God is so much bigger than my small little life. He made me and he loves me and he cares for me in the big stuff and in the small stuff. When I was at the deepest, darkest time of my whole life, he lifted me up and carried me through. Now, during the small stuff, he is walking with me every step of the way and building me up. I am so thankful that my parents raised me to have faith and believe that God is in control! I'm also thankful that God brought Josh and I together! He has blessed me with a loving family and extended family, two beautiful children, a roof over my head, a dependable car to drive and lots of great friends. This has been a great year and I can't wait to see what BIG things God is going to do in 2012!

Until next time...

Croswell Family Christmas Picture

2011-12-29T13:32:00.000-08:00

From the top: Larry, Tara (and baby Rush), Michael, Maren, Susan, Alex, Mamoo, Jude, Ashby, Josh, Me, Max, Tracie and Steve

Lazy Days

2011-12-29T09:51:00.000-08:00

How many of you are enjoying some lazy days before the new year? I know we are at the Croswell house! For the past week we have definitely been lazy and not getting much of anything done. Although it has been fun, this is all about to change. It's always nice to have lazy days, but at some point you start to feel like a slob and you just have to get up and do something. How many of you feel the same way?

We have a pile of boxes in our dining room that have been there for over a year and something has to be done with them. Most of them are boxes of Boomer's things that I really need to go through. Part of me wants to go through them and part of me doesn't. Josh and I decided that tomorrow is the day and we will be going through them and keeping a few things, but donating a bunch of it to Goodwill. God tells us that his love is sufficient and we know his grace is enough to make even the worst of days good!

Until next time...

Our Crazy Christmas!

2011-12-26T17:33:00.001-08:00

We are finally back home! Christmas for us started a week ago when we left here Wednesday night (or Thursday morning) at 3am to head to Frisco. We arrived to sleepy hugs and smiles from Steve, Tracie and Susan and we were so happy to be with our family! I will take too long to tell you everything that we did so I'll just hit some highlights. On Thursday we did a little last minute shopping, went downtown Frisco to see the musical lights, got caught in traffic by a really cool house, drove through Deer Field, and sang Christmas carols as loud as we could in the truck! On Friday we hung out and enjoyed visiting with each other, ate fajitas from LaHa, played minute to win it (thanks Tracie and Steve), listened to Josh read the Christmas story, opened gifts, and watched Christmas Vacation. Then on Saturday we just spent time talking and letting the kids play and then it was back home because Santa Claus was on his way!

We got home around 6pm and made a pallet in the living room floor, popped some popcorn, made some hot chocolate and watched The Polar Express. As soon as it went off, Ashby and Mamoo went to bed so that Santa would come. On Sunday morning, Ashby was sooooooo excited about what Santa brought! We opened the rest of the gifts and then were off to church. We had an awesome worship service with no electricity and then it was time for round 2.

We got to Overton around 3pm and the fun began. Noey and Jennifer and their kids were there and we opened gifts and then mom and dad sent the kids in the bedroom to see the bicycles they had bought for them. This was followed by screams for about 5 minutes. They finally got outside and rode their bikes on the porch because of the rain. One of the highlights in Overton was Christmas caroling around town. We went to 5 houses of friends and family and it was a blast! Monday and Tuesday were spent hanging out, riding bicycles, visiting with Granny, playing games, staying up late, eating, and laughing!

We arrived back home last night around 6pm and were in bed by 9:30! For the past 3 years Christmas has been really hard, but this year, Christmas was great! Not saying that I didn't think about Boomer or that I'm perfectly fine, but this was just the first year that I wasn't totally consumed in thoughts about him not being here with us. God is good and he always provides exactly what we need.

I hope that everyone of you had a great Christmas too and were able to spend time with your family and do all the things you wanted to do!

Until next time...

Minute to Win It! (Josh won)

Tara and Alex

Ashby and her 4 Wheeler from Santa

Dad reading the Christmas story

Ashby and her new bicycle!


Jude's Masterpiece!

Frisco Lights :)

2011-12-23T11:30:00.000-08:00

Last night we decided to get out and enjoy the sights and sounds of downtown Frisco at Christmas time. The whole downtown is lit up with lights that are synchronized to music. There's just something about Christmas lights and Christmas music that make you feel like a kid all over again.

Here are some of the things we saw last night...

Ashby, Alex and Jude

This was one of the houses in DeerField

Ashby was getting really tired

If I can figure out how to post a video I will be posting it soon.

Until next time...

Peanut Butter Balls :)

2011-12-22T17:17:00.001-08:00

Mixing the peanut butter...

Rolling the peanut butter...

She was trying to make a square...

The finished product! She was so proud of herself!

Christmas Baking!

2011-12-22T11:24:00.000-08:00

I'm finished with school for the semester, Ashby's done with MDO and the kitchen was calling my name today. I've never really been much of a baker, but since Ashby loves it so much I thought we would spend the whole day baking cookies and making goodies for our family. We started off making peanut butter balls. Ashby rolled out about 30! Then we moved on to chocolate chip cookies and sugar cookies. I really don't think I've ever done this much baking at my house since me and Josh have been married, but it was a lot of fun and I'm so glad we did it! The recipe I used for my sugar cookies is my Grandma Brown's and every time I eat them it brings back great memories of her house. I hope that when Ashby gets older and makes these cookies at her house it will bring back great memories of these fun baking days!
Until next time...
(I will try to post pics of the baking soon)

Christmas Time!

2011-12-19T07:33:00.000-08:00

This is going to be a busy week! Ashby and I are hanging out today and getting our house ready for our staff Christmas party tonight! I am so thankful that God is allowing us to minister with such a great group of people. This Sunday marks our 4 year anniversary on staff at South Union, but it feels like we have been here forever! I know that it is very easy to get so busy at this time of year that you fly through the season and never really think on why we celebrate Christmas. Not that we've forgotten or don't know, but Satan does what he does best and makes us too busy to concentrate on what really matters. When I was growing up we always had a stocking for Jesus on our mantel. On Christmas morning we would write a note to Jesus and tell him things that we hoped to do better in the coming year. This year we will be rereading all of those notes and I wonder what kind of job I have done on actually doing what I said I would do. I'm thankful for the way my parents raised me and I hope that Ashby will always be able to look back on Christmas traditions that brought her closer to God instead of what "stuff" she got.

I hope that you can all take some time this week to thank God for sending his son as a baby to sacrifice his life for us so we could have an eternity with him!

Until next time...

At Night Bird...

2011-12-13T07:28:00.000-08:00

I just wanted to add a little bit to one of my previous posts. I told you about "heavenly peas," but I forgot to mention "at night bird." Every time she sings the song she ends it with "at night bird." It took us quite a while to decipher this phrase as it is not as easy as "heavenly peas." We were in our pastors office a couple of days ago and she was singing Silent Night to him and it hit me! She's saying "at thy birth!" This little girl has definitely been exactly what we needed. She is hilarious and sweet and stubborn and loving all at the same time and I know God is forming her to be something special!
Until next time...

Heavenly Peas

2011-12-08T11:43:00.001-08:00

Ashby sang in her 3rd MDO program Sunday night at First Baptist and she did a marvelous job! The two songs that they sang were Holly Jolly Christmas and Silent Night. She practiced so hard on both of her songs and she knows most of the words. The first time we were practicing it at home she did a great job, but I noticed something towards the end of the song that I thought was funny. At the end of Silent Night she sang, "sleep in heavenly peas" instead of "heavenly peace." Before I started laughing (to myself of course), I asked her what heavenly peas were and she said, "They're the kind of peas you eat in Heaven." I love her so much and I am so thankful that God gave us such a sweet and cute little girl!

End of Semester!

2011-12-08T07:28:00.001-08:00

Well, another semester has come and gone! I only have one more final and I will be finished until January! Now it's on to my last semester...EVER!!!!!! Josh and I talked a few weeks ago and decided that I will not go to work immediately following graduation. We are planning on having another baby (sometime) and I would really like to be able to stay home with the baby. For those of you that know me well, you know that I'm very excited about this!

Everything at church is going great! We are in the process of doing dirt work for our new children's ministry building and I know that God is going to bless in this new endeavor. Once it is all complete I will share some pictures with everyone. Youth ministry is also going great! We went to a Casting Crowns/The Afters/Sanctus Real concert last weekend and it was AWESOME! I don't know about you, but I love Casting Crowns. I think it's because we can relate to them because they are all youth workers.

As far as Christmas goes...I am really missing Boomer (as always), but God has blessed us in so many ways that I could not possibly feel sorry for myself! Every year presents new and different challenges, but for this year we are doing good. I hope that all of you are enjoying a wonderful Christmas season together. Remember to enjoy the time that you have with your loved ones because you never know how much time you have with each of them.

Until next time...

Fall

2011-11-02T13:17:00.000-07:00

God is so awesome!!!!! We had our Harvest Fest Monday night at church and almost 700 people cam through the doors! But, even better than that, 2 people walked out with a new destination!!! It is always a lot of work but it is definitely worth it!
My classes are going good this semester. I only have one class that I am currently going to because of the way the other two worked out so it has been really weird. But, when spring gets here I will hit the ground running because it will be my LAST SEMESTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can't wait to be finished with school! I can't believe that it's almost here!
I am going to start leaving you with something that Ashby has said recently. Last week we were putting her room back together since we redecorated it and she was helping me sort through her toys. She found a cell phone and was pretending to talk on it. I told her to put the phone up because I needed her help and she said, "Mama, I can't because I'm talking to somebody!" So I replied with, "If you don't put that phone down I will take it away." Quicker than she's ever done anything before, she put the phone back up to her ear and said, "Ok, I gotta go, bye bye!" I love this kid!

First Day of School

2011-08-22T06:47:00.000-07:00

Well...I knew this day was coming. The first day of Kindergarten. When I woke up this morning I sat down in my chair and started checking facebook. It was great seeing everyone's kids going back to school in all their new clothes and backpacks. I just can't get off my mind that today would be Boomer's first day of Kindergarten. My biggest struggle right now is wondering what he would look like right now and how he would sound. What would his personality be like, would he be excited about going to school or would he hate it. The one thing I know for sure is that he is excited about where he is and I know that he loves it! I am praying for all of you who have little ones going off to their first day of Kindergarten and those of you who have bigger ones going back to school. God tells us that he has a plan and a purpose for our lives in Jeremiah...I pray that your children know this and that God does mighty things through them this school year!

2011-07-07T18:22:00.000-07:00

Well, I guess I better update my blog because I have decided that my husband is going to keep hacking his way in and posting crazy stuff until I do.

Just to get you all up to date, I have had a crazy few months. Life is great, but super busy! I just finished my two summer classes today so I have a little over a month off of school, but out summer is just getting busy. We had our first day of cheer camp today, which went really well, but I’m super tired. Josh and Ashby are at Pine Springs because Josh is preaching there this week. We leave for Bogg next week and then the week after that is Mission McAllen. Once all of that is over with we are going to try to go on a mini vacation before school starts again and we have our first football game!

Our life is crazy, but I love it! Sometimes I really wish we had time to just sit and do nothing, but I love being with students and getting to experience life with them. God has blessed us in so many ways and I am so thankful for that.

I hope this finds everyone having an awesome week!

Summer Time Is Here....

2011-06-29T11:46:00.000-07:00

Well, it all started about 9 years ago............
He walked into that Overton football game one Friday night and it happened. I was so taken by his rugged good looks and his charming ways. He was quite the looker and oh, how he looked in those clothes. Now I know some of you might be saying that he was way to awesome to be at the mustang game, seeing how he was a Oklahoma Sooner through and through and everyone there either was a longhorn fan or an aggie, but that day he was there to find me.

As I gazed into his blue eyes I noticed that there were fireworks going off in them & then I heard it coming from the bottom of the bleachers, "Christina, as they cried out" but we will leave that alone because it really has nothing to do with this story. As I saw him coming I got a little light headed and possibly blackout for a moment and then he said my name. I had never heard my name said like that before, so smooth and aromatic.

All of my friends has said there was this guy coming to the game and I should meet him. He was one of the AWESOME people form Oklahoma and he had his own Bible. At that moment I knew there was going to be something different about this guy. Okay, back to when I saw him. He was pretty sly for a white guy and had some awesome wicked hair. He was not like all of the other guys I had dated, he was a foot to a foot and a half taller then all the rest of them and quite a bit bigger. Okay he was a man, full grown power swinger, he was a big ole' brawny man.... He was Josh Croswell and I have been smitten with him ever since. I love you, Josh Croswell you are the greatest, bestess, amazing, unbelievable, insanely good looking, man I have ever met.

Hacked!

2011-06-04T08:07:00.001-07:00

I guess by now, if I still have anyone that reads my blog, you have noticed that I was hacked! I do love my husband and he is awesome! I know I haven't really done a great job of blogging but, as always, I will try to do better. The first summer session is about to begin so I'm sure I will get busy and not write anything, but I will try. Hopefully it won't be November when I post again!

I Think That My Husband Is Amazing!!!

2011-06-03T08:39:00.000-07:00

Words can't describe him. He is my heart, my soul, my strength, my everything. It is so sad that I can only put mere words to his name to descibe him for he is so incredible. I want to shout it from a mountian top that he is amazing. I guess this will have to do for now. Just know that I will live my life to spread the joy of my husband to all just so that you may experience the joy of him that I have. Josh, YOU THE MAN!!! I guess this will have to do as my blog for the next 5 months since I only update it twice a year. Until November...

School Is In Session!!

2011-01-18T18:15:00.000-08:00

Well tonight is my first night of class for the Spring semester (the first of my last 3 :))!! I had my first experience with a long distance learning class. I've already decided that I like to see my teachers face to face! Watching them on a screen is for the birds. If you want to answer a question it is very awkward! The class that I'm in right now is Texas History. Hopefully this history class will go better than the other history classes I've taken over the years! I have an 8 o'clock class in the morning so I'm not so sure how this is going to go. I already know that this semester will be way better than last year, so for that I am thankful! Hopefully I will be able to keep you all posted better than I did in the fall!
Hope everyone is having a great week!!

A New Year!

2011-01-06T08:02:00.000-08:00

It's a new year and of course many people have decided to declare New Year's Resolutions! Well this year I have many! Two main things that I am going to try to focus on in 2011 are weight loss and spiritual growth. The bible study that I am doing is Come Thirsty by Max Lucado. In this study I am trying to focus on how Jesus Christ is all I need and he will satisfy every need!
Tonight is the night that I start Weight Watchers. I have tried this program before and I have had success so I know I can do it again!
Please say a little prayer for me as I begin this journey of weight loss and spiritual growth.

Thankful...

2011-01-04T11:44:00.000-08:00

I am so thankful for the people in my life. I wrote a few days ago about a great friend of mine who came to visit last week and today I am reminded of a great friend who I haven't been able to see in a long time. Before Josh and I got married he introduced me to B. Since we met almost 10 years ago, she has been a great friend who, even though we don't talk much, is one of my friends that I feel I am closest to in spirit. We have both been through huge storms and I know I can always count on prayers from her! As I was reading her blog today I was reminded that God loves us so much. Just like me, she has a son in heaven with Jesus. I am so thankful that I could read her blog today and see pictures of her growing family...which includes two sons. One of my favorite songs is Blessed Be Your Name. God gives and he takes away, but all the while we should be shouting BLESSED BE YOUR NAME, because he is always faithful and even though there are things in our lives that are taken away, he loves us so much that he returns that joy to us! I can't tell you how awesome it is to see the joy in B's face again!! I love you B!

Children's Walk 2009

Where Is Your Focus?

2011-01-03T10:42:00.001-08:00

Have I ever said how much I love my church??? Well, I do! Every week I am challenged on Sunday morning during our worship service to be a better servant and follower of Jesus Christ. This Sunday we were challenged to refocus our lives on Christ. As I started to think of all the things I am focused on, I realized that God is one of those things but he is definitely not in the little box that indicates the main focus on my camera. This week I am striving to get him there! Some of you are probably a lot like me. There aren't a lot of sinful things (although there are a few) that stand in the way of my time spent with God, but it's things like playing with Ashby, cleaning, watching TV, facebooking, or just being lazy. My goal is to set aside a time each day where I can have real solitude time with God (not just time when I do my bible study while Ashby is running around playing). I challenge all of you to take a few minutes and figure out what it is that is taking time away from your relationship with God, good or bad and figure out how you can change things around a little so you can have a more focused relationship with him.

May we all make a direct effort this year to grow spiritually so that we can be a better witness to those around us and show them just how awesome our God really is!!

Another Step In The Right Direction

2011-01-01T09:12:00.000-08:00

This week we got to spend some time with some of our best friends, the Smiths. We always know we are going to have a lot of fun when they get to visit! They are the type of friends that, it doesn't matter how long it's been since we've seen them, it's like we've never been apart! When we lived in Oklahoma, we were at their house all the time and Boomer fit right in with their boys. I think Boomer even thought they were his big brothers. Not long after Boomer passed away, Jessica told me that when I was ready, she wanted some of Boomer's shirts so that she could have a blanket made out of them. Through our grief journey we have been able to share the healing process with many people through many different things. So I am so glad that I waited on Jessica to be here with me to go through all of Boomer's clothes. The second day they were here, we got down all of the boxes out of the attic and went through all of his clothes, from birth to 2 years. I knew that the day I went through his clothes would be a hard day so I put it off as long as I could but i am so thankful that I have now done it and I picked out some very memorable clothes that I will be able to look at anytime I need to. I am so thankful to Jessica and her boys (Chad included) for all of their love and the support they have shown us through everything...we love you guys!!

Goodbye 2010

2011-01-01T08:07:00.000-08:00

What a great year! I have so many things to be thankful for that there is no way I could ever list them all! One of the biggest blessings in my life is my husband. I never imagined I would find a man who was as great as he is. If it weren't for him, I would be having pity party after pity party for myself! He always finds ways to remind me how much God has blessed us and how much he loves us. I know that God made him just for me! And then there's Ashby...what can I ever say about Ashby? From day one she has been a huge blessing! She is growing up so fast and there is no way to hold on to today. I am trying my best to enjoy each day and cherish it as much as I can because I know that it will only be a short time and I will be looking back on these days missing them. Then, I have the best extended family in the whole world! I am so thankful for my mom and dad and my brother and sister. They have all loved me, even when I should not have been blessed with their love. They even married some pretty great people! When I was younger, I stood up in front of our church during a testimonial service and told the congregation that I had the perfect family. Even though now I know we all have flaws, I still feel like I have the perfect family! I have the world's best in-laws. Even though I only knew him for a few years, my father-in-law was one of the greatest examples of love that I have ever known. My mother-in-law loves me just like I was her own and I have the best sisters-in-law you could ever imagine! Not to mention they are married to some awesome guys! And what would I do without all of my nieces and nephews? They are all hilarious and awesome! There are so many more blessings would take too long to write about but I am still thankful for each one! I love all of you more than I could ever express. May we all allow God to work through us in 2011!!

Counting All My Blessings!

2010-12-14T08:41:00.000-08:00

This is Ashby's Mother's Day Out Program at First Baptist. She was telling me that she could see herself on the tv at the back of the church! She was too cute!! I love her so much and I am so thankful that God has blessed us with her!

When Things Catch You Off Guard

2010-12-14T08:25:00.000-08:00

Since Boomer went to live with Jesus, we have heard over and over again that the pain gets easier and easier to deal with over time. I guess that’s why it totally caught me off guard when I broke down last week and sobbed like Ashby does when she doesn’t get something that she wants. As I sat on the couch in Josh’s arms, I realized that I’m just like Ashby. There’s something I want more than anything and I can’t have it! Last year was a little easier than the year before so I just assumed this year would be a little easier than last year, but I was wrong. This year feels just like the first and I was not prepared for that. As I sit here spilling my heart out, I am looking at our stockings hung on the mantel. Yes, we still have Boomer’s stocking right there along with ours! As I think of all the things I won’t get to see him do this Christmas season, or the presents that I won’t get to buy, I start to have a pity party for myself. As I sat in choir practice last Saturday and balled because I won’t ever get to see him get up with all the rest of the kids and sing in a musical, I started having a pity party for myself. As I see all the shoppers out buying presents and looking happy because they are buying for all of their kids, I start to throw a pity party for myself. But as I think of what it might be like to see Boomer as he is now, in heaven with Jesus, I remember that all of the pain that I’m feeling right now is not forgotten. God knows exactly how I feel and he is holding me tight in his arms.

I read a book recently about a family that went through something similar to what we have gone through and it was very hard for me to read. One of the biggest differences in our stories was that they have a substantial amount of money and everyone knows that I stay home and Josh is a youth minister, so they were able to go on trips and leave work for long periods of time without worrying about money and they could take all of their loved ones to counselors and get them all the help they needed. As the story unfolded, I realized they had all these luxuries that our family didn’t have, I wish we could have paid for everyone that was at our house that day to go to a counselor to help them make it through what they saw, and I wish that we could have gone thousands of miles away from here for a long time. Then I also realized that God’s grace is sufficient and he provides for all of his children in ways that we could never imagine. Although the people in the book that I read did have many more opportunities than we did because of their financial status, we still have everything that we have ever needed. God is so much bigger than having money and friends in high places! He is a God of love and grace and peace. That’s why I know that even though my life is so small, God is so big and he will take care of even me.

Spending The Day With Ashby!

2010-11-17T14:33:00.000-08:00

Since school started back this fall I have been trying to work as many days as possible. Because of this, I have spent many days away from Ashby and I have really missed our time together. Today was an awesome day. We woke up early and ate a sausage biscuit from McDonald's, then we gave Kali and bath, then we played with finger paints, then wrote in colored shaving cream, then went to my school for a little bit, then played outside!! I had so much fun just hanging out with her today. All I keep thinking is that these days are going by so fast and she is growing up and one day I'm going to wish that these days were back! Hope you enjoy these pics :)

College...

2010-09-20T17:40:00.000-07:00

This week I start the 4th week of the fall semester and I am already starting the countdown to the end of the semester. On Monday nights I have Reading 343 which I haven't really learned much in to this point. The great part about this class is that we always get out early but we really don't learn much which won't be good when it comes time to take the test! I go to school Monday and Tuesday night and Wednesday late afternoon which has really been a struggle. I am already tired of fixin supper and sitting down to eat then leaving a few minutes later to the sound of Ashby crying because she wants me to stay home. Then I get to school and I feel like I'm really not learning much and I feel like it is all for nothing. I know that in a couple of years I will be teaching and all that money will be flowing in (haha) and I will know that it was all for a purpose but for now it's just not feeling that way. I don't want my blog to be a big prayer request line, but for this post I am going to ask for your prayers. I know through everything that we have been through, prayer is the only thing that gets you through certain situations, so I am asking you now to remember me and this semester when you pray.
Until next time...

Yesterday's Youth

2010-09-17T06:09:00.001-07:00

Last night at church we had our annual Senior Appreciation Banquet. It was a time for our church staff to come together and serve the more mature members of our church (and our parents) who mean so much to us. Thanks to our church life minister, we had fried chickens, along with mashed potatoes, green beans, a roll and then dessert. Soon after dinner was served the church staff, and their lovely wives, were the entertainment for the evening. We sang a few great old songs and had a blast. I know that some people would think that an evening like this would be boring, but I look forward to it every year.
Every month, this same group comes together on a Thursday night to share food, memories, games and fun. We are always priveledged to enjoy this evening with them which is something I love. There are many things that I love about sharing this evening with our "Yesterday's Youth" like great food, stories, and lots of laughter, but my favorite part is just getting to sit and visit with the generation of our church that has made it what it is today. In my opinion, South Union Baptist Church is the greatest church in the world. The main reason for this is because of the members of Yesterday's Youth. I love each and every one of them and I am so thankful that they are such great examples of faithful followers of Christ!

Substitute Teaching

2010-09-16T10:30:00.000-07:00

For any of you that don't know, I am a substitute teacher. I have been working at Daingerfield High School for about 2 and a half years and I really enjoy it. Some people have asked why I substitute at the high school when I want to teach elementary. Here are the reasons why...

At the high school level:
1. you don't have to memorize names
2. you don't have to take children to the restroom
3. if you work for a coach you usually have a shorter day
4. and I really like the staff in the office

When working at the elementary level:
1. you work all day and are standing most of the day
2. you don't have a big break in the middle of the day
3. you have to know all of the kids names
4. there is more work involved

Now I know some of you are thinking, "it sounds like she is just lazy!" But how many of you would rather do less work for the same amount of money? I know I would, plus I get to see all of our students when I work at the high school.

Thankfully I will be finished with college in a few short semesters and I will be the one calling for substitutes! I know the day I get to walk across that stage and declare to all of my family and friends that I am a college graduate will be a victorious day in my life and I can't wait for it!!!
Until then, just keep me in your prayers because I know that I'm gonna need it!

Busy Life!

2010-09-15T10:00:00.001-07:00

Wow! It's been many months since my last post. I know there aren't many who read this blog since the only one who has noticed that lack of a post in the past 9 months has been Josh! Oh well.
To catch you up on what has been going on in the last few months, it's going to take a lot, so I will just make a list.

1. School
2. School
3. School
4. Summer
5. School
6. Youth Events
7. School
8. School
9. School
10. School

As you can tell, the majority of my time is taken up by school. This semester I am taking 12 hours again. I know that for a fresh college student, who is only going to school (and maybe working) this doesn't really seem like a lot. But for me it seems like an overload. I have class from 7-9:45 on Monday and Tuesday nights, then I have a class from 4-6:45 on Wednesday night, and then one online class. My prayer for this semester is that it will fly by so fast that I won't even realize that I had such a crazy schedule. I hate missing out on things with my family and with our students at church but I know that this is something that I must do now or it will only be harder to finish!
I will try to continue to blog as much as possible but please forgive me if it is not as often as you would like. God has done some awesome things in our life since January and I would love to tell you all about them, but I really need to do some homework right now, so that post will just have to wait until a later time.
Please be in prayer for me this semester...it's going to take a lot of prayer to get me through this one!
Until next time...

New Beginnings!

2010-01-28T09:26:00.000-08:00

I know I'm a little late on the "New Year" blog entry but I'm just a little behind. Please forgive me.

I have officially completed all of my "first days" of college! I am taking Children's Lit, Advanced Expository Writing, Advanced Technological Communications, and Reading Overviews and Strategies. I actually think I am going to really enjoy all of my classes. The only negative is that there will be a lot of homework in every class. Usually you get one or two that are a little easier on the homework but all of these have about the same amount. Even though it will be a lot of work I really think I am going to learn a lot and I am excited about this semester!

Ashby is doing lots of new things since the last time I talked with all of you! She is using the potty almost all of the time. We still have quite a few accidents but it is getting better and better everyday! She has 16 teeth so her smile is beautiful!!! She has been moved up to the 2 year old class at Mother's Day Out and she loves her new teacher, Mrs. Stacey. We have watched Strawberry Shortcake and Cars more times than we can count in the past month and we are lovin every minute of it! She has started talking like crazy and you can actually understand most of the things that she says! She is growing up so quick and time is flying by but we are trying to make the most of every minute we have with her.

As far as church goes...IT'S AWESOME!!! On our first Wednesday night of the new year I was privileged to lead one of my junior high girls to the Lord! It was such an awesome way to ring in the new year! Our first big event was Hot Hearts in Beaumont Texas. We took 19 kids and had a blast! On the first night we had 3 students that changed their eternal destination!!! As if God hadn't blessed us enough on Friday night, He decided to show off a little more and 2 more of our kids got saved on Saturday!!!! Josh and I are still beaming from a wonderful weekend and wonderful blessings!!

So far this has been an awesome year and I only expect it to get better! I hope this finds all of you having a great week!

Christmas!

2009-12-13T13:07:00.000-08:00

Who loves Christmas? Since I was a little girl I have loved Christmas!! I learned, growing up in church, that Jesus is the reason for the season, Joy to the World the Lord is Come, and it was a Silent Night! I know that without Christ there would be no Christmas. I am so glad that Jesus came to earth and died and rose so that I could have everlasting life through him!!!

Every year at Christmas time I would look so forward to going to Granny's for Christmas Eve and Grandma's Christmas night. On Christmas Eve we would listen to the same cassette tape and make sugar cookies, date nut balls, and rolls at our house. Then we would travel the long 5 minute car ride over to Granny's to share our goodies with all of my cousins. There are six siblings on my mom's side of the family and I have 18 cousins (and now between all of the cousins we almost have 40 kids) so you can imagine that it was a little hectic at Granny and Pappaw's house. I loved getting to play outside until it was time to eat, then eat all the scrumptious holiday food, then beg our parents to let us open the presents under the tree! Among the many traditions that I share with my family is Christmas Caroling. Before we could open any presents,the girls would pile up in our van and the boys in Aunt Phyllis' van and off we went to sing to all of our close family friends! The list has changed over the years but it is still a tradition that must be carried on. We would finally get back to the house and open our presents, then our parents would rush us out the door to get back home before Santa came to visit our house! I could go on and on about Christmas, but I will stop here...some of the greatest memories of my life are from Christmas time!!

Now that I'm older and I get to spend Christmas with Josh's family, I realize that not everyone shares a crazy Christmas with a house full of screaming kids, but I still love it! I cannot wait to step into Granny's house on Christmas Eve this year and start making memories with Ashby! Her memories will be different than mine, but they will be filled with love. Big families are crazy but I wouldn't want it any other way!

Maybe Not How You Wanted Your Life To Turn Out...

2009-12-04T05:37:00.000-08:00

Please read this carefully...

What do you think God's view of your life's puzzle looks like? Do you think it has any resemblance to what you see when you think of your puzzle? We all know that there are pieces of our puzzle that don't match up to what we think the whole thing looks like. We can't see it all so to us some of the pieces are a very big disappointment! Some people feel like just because God hasn't made our puzzle look the way we want it to look means that our whole life is a mess. I believe that even when things don't turn out exactly like you want them to, God is still in control! Instead of looking at only one piece I think we should look at all the surrounding pieces. The only way we can have blessings in our lives is if we let them be blessings. Take a look around you and instead of counting everything as loss, reach out for the blessings! As all of you know there have been pieces of my puzzle that I would love to rip up and throw in the garbage, but I know that the puzzle is a beautiful creation. So, I take the messed up pieces, hand them to God and allow him to continue to piece together the puzzle of my life. He tells me that I am beautifully and wonderfully made and that he holds every bit of me in his hands. So why be bitter about the things I don't like. Just take it all in and give it to him and he can make a masterpiece out of a bunch of scribbles!
I hope you can look for the blessings in your life and concentrate on that instead of wallowing in thoughts of your life not turning out the way you had planned!

What a mighty God we serve!

2009-11-16T20:22:00.000-08:00

There have been times in my life where I knew that God was real and that he did awesome things but I didn't really understand it like I do right now. Nine months ago, right before Boomer's birthday I spoke at a women's meeting at a church in our area. The whole experience was awesome and I really felt like I was able to share Boomer's story in a way that would help someone that might need it. Little did I know, a woman was there that had been dealing with some of the "God" issues that I had dealt with during my grief journey. Her husband passed away a few years ago and she was still feeling angry with God. I was told today that because I shared Boomer's story, this woman realized that she could get on with her life and do something with what God had given her. As my friend told me this story and as I told Josh this story and as I told my mom the story....all I could do was cry! GOD IS REAL AND HE DOES AWESOME THINGS!! My prayer was that God would use me (and Josh) in anyway that he wanted to help others who had been through the same things that we have been through. I am so thankful that he can turn something completely negative into something so totally positive! As long as someone asks I will travel wherever it takes to share Boomer's story!

Now, here we are in November and I have been asked to come and speak at a women's meeting in a town about an hour away in January. Please pray that there will be some woman there that will benefit from Boomer's story. God does not ask us to move mountains, he only asks us to BE WILLING to pick up one small stone at a time.

College!!!

2009-11-12T08:59:00.000-08:00

The time has come for me to get out the pens, paper, books, spirals and courage! I finished filling out the FAFSA, completed my admissions application and I'm going to meet with my counselor today. Josh and I had a really long "talk" about me going back to school yesterday. For some reason when this subject comes up it is always a very touchy one. I have already completed 2 1/2 years of college so you are probably thinking (just like he does) that this should be no big deal. I should just be able to fill out all the paperwork and skip to school with my backpack, pens and paper, right? Wrong! THAT'S NOT WHAT IT'S LIKE FOR ME!!! I finally realized yesterday that the reason this is always a touchy subject, is because I am scared out of my mind! What if I fail...what if the teacher calls on me and I don't know the answer...what if I look weird...what if I don't fit in...what if I can't catch on as fast as everyone else...what if I've already forgotten everything that I've already learned...what if it's been so long since I was in school that I can't do it????? These are all the things that are running through my mind. Hopefully going to the counselor today will help me get refocused and ready to get back at it! Please pray that when the day comes for me to begin the journey back to school that I can boldly walk into the classroom with my backpack on and my pens and pencils ready to go!!! I'm really going to need it!

Blessings

2009-11-09T13:01:00.000-08:00

I feel so truly blessed! I have a husband that loves me and takes care of me, a daughter that has the cutest expressions (she could make anybody smile) and a son that made such an impression on people that people are still talking about him. Ninteen months and 20 days ago I really thought that I might not ever be happy again but today I am exclaiming to the world that I am happy and thankful to God for making me this way! This is the day the Lord has made. I will rejoice and be glad in it!!!

Baby Turkett

2009-11-04T11:31:00.001-08:00

Sorry it's been so long since I've posted anything but I've been a little busy.
About 6 months ago I was sitting in a restaurant in Frisco with Tracie and Steve, Mamoo, Nonnie, and Susan. She started crying and scared us all to death to tell us that she was about 15 weeks pregnant!! She was balling and we were all so excited! Yesterday morning we got a text at 4:55am telling us that Maren Rhys had been welcomed into the world! She was born at 4:44am and weighed 8lbs. and 4 oz. and was 21 inches long! We still haven't seen her yet but hopefully we will see her very soon.

CONGRATULATIONS to MICHAEL, SUSAN, TARA, LARRY, ALEX, AND JUDE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Uncle Josh, Aunt Christina and Ashby can't wait to see you baby Maren!

Proud Wife!

2009-09-28T16:50:00.000-07:00

When Josh came home from work today he was just beaming! He told me that a guy (Judson) that was a teenager when we were at Calvary in Henderson called him today. Then he started this long story about their conversation...

Judson recently went to the wedding of one of his best (girl) friends from high school. After the wedding he and a few of his friends were sitting around talking at one table and a couple tables over was the bride's father and some of his friends. He kept hearing the bride's father talking about this new youth minister in his town. Not knowing where he lived, he didn't really pay much attention. Here and there he would catch a thing or two that was being said about this youth minister. Things like, our principal loves him, our secretaries love him, even a few of the teachers have said great things about him. He is at the school all the time; at football games, volleyball games and he is seen doing stuff all over town. He also heard that he has been one of the greatest influences on the kids in his town and he is really making a difference in their community. When he got to the part about the youth minister's two year old son passing away about a year and a half ago Judson's ears perked up. He leaned over to their table and said, "Are you talking about Josh Croswell?" The man (the superintendent of Daingerfield/Lone Star ISD) said,"Yeah, that's who I'm talking about, how do you know him?" Judson went on to tell him that Josh is one of the reasons he makes the good decisions that he makes, and that he (and Josh King) was one of the biggest influences on him when he was a teenager!

Wow, what a compliment!! I am so proud to call Josh Croswell my husband and I am so thankful that he is allowing God to use him in such a huge way! I don't think I could be any more proud, even if something like that was said about me!

Fall is Here!!

2009-09-25T10:37:00.000-07:00

It's that time of year again! I walked outside this morning and you can just sense that things are beginning to change. No more sultry summer days, no more dips in the swimming pool, no more sunburns, and no more sweat!
I don't know what it is about fall but it is definitely one of my favorite seasons. The smell outside, the beautiful color of the trees, the aroma of burning brush piles, and getting to snuggle up with a big cup of hot chocolate on the back porch! Something about walking outside and smelling all that fall has to offer gets me excited.
I hope that all of you have a wonderful fall season this year!

Have Fun!

2009-09-21T07:30:00.000-07:00

This is for all the mommy's of young ones and the mommy's to be!
How many of you have ever said to your little one, "No, let me do it. I don't want you to get dirty." I am guilty of saying this on more than one occasion! As I was getting Ashby out of her bed this morning she was saying, "nummy?" Yes with a question mark, like can we go get some food cause I'm starving! So we went into the kitchen, I put her in her high chair and started making her some oatmeal. She waited patiently in her little chair until I was finally finished. I brought the oatmeal over to her and started trying to feed it to her, but she was wining and putting her hands in front of her face like she didn't want it. I have realized over the past couple of months that this doesn't mean I don't want any, but it means I want to do it myself! So I said, "No, let me do it. I don't want you to get dirty." She looked at me with those beautiful blue eyes and I thought to myself, "what difference does it make if she gets dirty? We have a bathtub, soap and time!" I gave her the spoon and the bowl and said, "have at it!"

A few minutes later she started saying, "Mommy, Mommy!" So I went over and she wanted me to help (picture me with a big smile on my face)! As I am typing this she is sitting in her chair with oatmeal all over her face, hands, hair, shirt and Kali (our dog)! It is one of the cutest things I will see today and she is so proud of herself for doing it all by herself!

Sometimes I feel like this is how we are with God. He tries everyday to help us do things and we don't want his help because we want to do it all on our own. But just like Ashby started calling for me because she needed help, we call for him because we need his help! He is always there to pick right back up where he left off. I know with our kids there will come a day when they really don't need our help anymore. They will be all grown up with kids of their own. But there will never be a day when we don't need the help of our Savior! Even when we think we can do it on our own he will be right there to pick up where he left off! Isn't that a wonderful feeling!!

Marriage

2009-09-14T11:40:00.000-07:00

7 Years!!! Sometimes it seems unreal that Josh and I have been married for 7 years, but other times it feels like we have been married forever! For our anniversary we really didn't do much. Josh went to go play golf so me and Ashby stayed home and baked some sugar cookies for him.
When I was growing up, one very vivid memory I have is from my Grandma Brown's house. Every time we went to her house the very first thing we did was run into the kitchen to see if there were any sugar cookies in the cookie jar....of course there always were!

Every time I smell or taste those cookies it brings back great memories of my Grandma. So to get back to our anniversary...we spent most of the morning measuring, mixing, rolling and baking the sugar cookies. I had lots of fun and I think Ashby did too! Josh had lots of fun eating the finished product!

We have always heard that the 1st and 5th years of marriage are the hardest. For us it has been the 6th and 7th. During the past 2 years there have been times when we just wanted to strangle each other, but God wrapped his arms around us and held us until we knew that there was no one in this world that we loved more than each other.

We can see how a major tragedy could cause a marriage to be stressed and even end, but we are living proof that with God all things are possible. I know without a shadow of a doubt that Josh is the one for me and I love him more today than I did 7 years ago when I married him!

VACATION!!!!!

2009-08-20T15:27:00.000-07:00

It's vacation time!! As I think back over family vacations I am reminded of lots of great memories that have gotten better over the years. At the time they were moments that I thought would never end, but now I look back and laugh with tears in my eyes! Let's take a short walk down memory lane.

The first vacation memory is from when I was 10. We went to Galveston to see the ocean for the first time. We had an awesome time at nasty, stinky Astro World, then it was on to the beach! We got there and it was awesome! The waves were huge (for kids) and we were having a blast. While we were in the ocean my dad realizes that he can't find his keys (yes we were in the ocean). Somewhere in the bottom of the Galveston Bay are my dad's keys, to this day.

The second great vacation memory I have was from when I was probably 12. Every time we had a chance we went to Arkansas to visit family. My Granny and Pappaw are both from the most beautiful part of Arkansas, the Ozarks. I believe it was over spring break one year when we decided to take a small hike up B Mountain in Cox Valley. We have a cousin that lives at the base of the mountain so we began at his house. The adventure began at about 10am. We looked at beautiful trees, saw lots of fossil rocks, lots of moss, and beautiful scenery! We saw some cave dwellings and felt like true outdoorsmen (and women). As we were on our way back down the mountain, a tree limb caught my dads keys and ripped them off his keychain. As he started looking for the keys we kept walking because we didn't realize that he wasn't with us. As we kept going we realized that he wasn't with us and we weren't sure how to get back. Needless to say, we made it back down the mountain 4 hours later wet and starving!!

The last vacation memory I will share with you was when I was 14. We went on a trip to Biloxi, Mississippi and to this day we still say it smells like a big stink bomb. We were going to the beach one day to have lots of fun in the sun. Little did we know that dad was once again planning on making lots of memories. As we got closer to the beach we saw a jeep driving on the sand. I'm not sure what my dad was thinking at this point, in our Astro minivan, but as we drove past the sign that said, "NO DRIVING ON THE BEACH," I'm sure he wasn't thinking at all! Not long after we passed the sign we were no longer moving. Yes, we were stuck, on the beach, with no way of getting unstuck. As soon as my mom realized what was happening her and Noey got out of the van. Stacey and I got out of our seats and layed on the floor of the van so no one could see us. I still remember the policeman asking my dad what he was thinking. I'm not sure of the answer, but I'm sure it sounded something like, "I'm a Brown and we know everything!"

As I said before, we have had many memorable vacations! I'm sure this vacation will be no different than any other. Especially since the back windshield of Noey and Jennifer's Trailblazer has already busted out and we haven't even left our house yet!!

Stay tuned to find out what our next adventure holds!!!

Boomer Kisses!

2009-08-18T07:44:00.000-07:00

One of my favorite things is hugs and kisses from my babies! Before Boomer passed away he had started giving me "big lip" kisses. He would grab my cheeks and stick his lips out as far as he could and then give me a kiss. That was one of the things I missed so much after his accident! I longed to hear his voice, hold him in my arms, and get big lip kisses. Well, this week, Ashby has started giving Boomer Kisses! She can't quite pucker up like he did but she has started grabbing my face and giving me kisses! I love it!!! I just tell her to give me a Boomer kiss and she grabs my face with those precious little hands and pulls my face to hers and it is the best feeling in my world right now!! She has no idea what she is doing to me when she does things like that. Isn't it awesome how God knows just how to take care of you? I don't know why he had to take Boomer so early, but I do know why he gave Ashby to us when he did. He knew that she was exactly what we needed for just a time as this!
I hope everyone finds something this week that God is doing just for you!

Good Friends!

2009-08-15T17:06:00.000-07:00

There are not many things that are better than hanging out with friends that you haven't seen in a long time. We went to Shreveport for my sisters surgery yesterday (which went really well) and then stopped through Marshall on the way home to surprise some friends. Mike and Becca Roberts are two friends that we have both known for a really long time. When I was a little girl at Arp First Baptist church they went to church with us. When I met Josh he was going to TBI in Henderson. Before we went on a date one night he had to go talk to a guy that he was going to school with so we stopped by there before we left. When he came to the door I realized it was Mike! Isn't it weird how small the world really is! Well anyway, at about 5 o'clock we stopped by their house for just a minute, and ended up eating dinner with them and leaving at about 10. We reminised about seminary and when I was little going to their house riding horses and making monkey bread. Their boys are all grown up (Josh 18, Kasey 15, Brett 13). They are such an awesome family. When I think of them I think of what an awesome minister Mike is and what a loving mother and wife Becca is. My prayer is that when people think of us they feel the same way that we feel about the Roberts...They are really good friends and even though we don't see each other often, we know we could count on them for anything!

And just a side note:
Ashby is just like her Boomer! While we were waiting on my sister to get out of surgery she was the star of the waiting room. She crawled up between two women on a couch, she played cards with two teenage girls, and she made friends with an older man who was visiting with his family!

I love my daughter and I am glad that she is a social butterfly! And it makes me smile to think of how friendly my son was too! I love my family!!

No More Pacifier!!!

2009-08-11T13:04:00.000-07:00

Well today is the second day of Miss Ashby with no pacifier! It has been kind of tough but we are definitely not turning back now. I really thought bed time would be the worst but it is actually nap time when she wants it the most. I thought I would share a few pics of how cute she looked with it in her mouth so we can all remember the days! Enjoy :)

Church Camp

Reading Books

Hanging out on the back porch!

I will have to admit that I am a little sad about the pacifier being gone. I don't know if it's that she's growing up a little bit or if it just means that we are entering a new phase in our lives or what but it does make me a little sad. On the other hand it makes me really happy!! No more crawling around on my hands and knees trying to find a pacifier so that she will stop screaming in the middle of the night, no more searching the car, searching the backpack, and no more wasting money on new ones because none of the searching turned up a pacifier!
Thank you God for giving us two beautiful babies that we love more than anything!!

Grandma Brown

2009-08-04T08:15:00.000-07:00

For any of you that don't know my Grandma Brown passed away a couple of weeks ago. I have written about her before on my blog but I just want to tell you about what it was like right before she met Jesus face to face.
As I said in my last post about her, she was one of the most awesome Christian women I have ever known. She had 12 children whom she loved very much and lots of grandchildren and great grandchildren that she also loved.
My mom would call and give me updates on her because Josh and I were at church camp and we couldn't go and see her. The first night she called she said that Grandma had been seeing Grandpa all day and then there was something else. She also said that she kept asking him, "Who is that little boy with you?" Mom asked her if it was Boomer and she said yes but we also think that it could have been a baby that she had premature that was stillborn. Who knows who it was....that's just awesome no matter how you look at it!
The next night as we were walking out of the evening worship time mom called back to let me know that my Grandma had passed away. As she began telling me about what happened the day of her death I was amazed at her once again. As people were coming into her room to visit her or care for her or clean up she would ask them, "do you know Jesus?" What a legacy!! Even until the end she was witnessing to people and trying to win souls for the Lord. Oh if I could only be like my Grandma Brown!

This is almost the whole family. When there are this many people it is hard to get everyone to look at the camera and be still so this is the best picture I could get!

Playing Catch Up!!

2009-06-25T12:26:00.000-07:00

Just to catch you up a little since I have just kind of jumped back in to this thing:

December was a tough month. It was our first Christmas without Boomer and Josh's dad (James/Papoo) was at home with Hospice. Our normal Christmas traditions were put on the back burner this year because we felt that we could not do our normal thing because it would be too tough. My family came here to our house for a couple of days and we had a blast. It was bittersweet because it was Ashby's first Christmas but it was also the first Christmas without Boomer. Then...we went to Josh's parents for Christmas with his family. Papoo was able to sit in the room with us while we opened presents and had the occasional tear or two. All in all Christmas was sad but good.

January was even tougher than December. On January 22nd we were all in the room singing and praising God when Papoo recieved the ultimate healing and saw Jesus face to face! He also got to see Boomer again! I will never forget, right before he passed away he looked up to Mamoo and moved his mouth like he was trying to say something to her. Who knows what it was...was he telling her how awesome it was to see the angels, was he saying I love you, was he saying I see Boomer, or was he just saying can't wait to see you again??? Many questions but one thing's for sure...He is completely healed and enjoying the most awesome experience that we could never imagine!!

February was the last month of our first year without Boomer. Minr and Boomer's birthdays were this month. We had a birthday party just like we would if he was here. It was hard having a party but I figured it would be even harder to act like it wasn't his birthday. That day was actually harder than the one year anniversary of his death. We had cupcakes and blew up lots of balloons. We invited all the kids we would have invited normally. I made little strips of paper for all of them to write on and they wrote their favorite verse on one side and a memory of Boomer on the other side. We tied them to the balloon strings and then had prayer in the front yard and then let the balloons go. It was also a bittersweet month.

March was of course tough but God also made it a great month. We went camping with about 20 people from church on the 18th-21st to try to be out of our normal surroundings. It was definitely a good idea because we were surrounded by people from church that helped keep our mind off of things. It was an experience that we loved and will try to do again next year. Ashby's birthday was also this month but we decided to wait and celebrate it the first weekend of April.

April was a fun month. We had Ashby's first birthday in our backyard with lots of friends and family. I don't know how much she enjoyed it but we had a blast!

May was another great month. Not a lot happened but it was great.

Through this whole past year we have had a lot of ups and downs but we have had a good year. Even when you think that nothing good could ever come out of certain circumstances God makes a way for things to be okay. We are a living example that GOD IS AWESOME!!!!!!!!

Beaver's Bend

2009-06-25T11:58:00.001-07:00

At the beginning of this week we went to Beaver's Bend in Oklahoma with 5 of our high school students. It was a blast!! We got to sit in the biggest chair in Oklahoma!!!
We went kayaking, bumper boating, swimming in some stinking cold water, and tubing at the lake!

I think tubing was one of the funnest things I have done in a long time! I laughed so hard my stomach was hurting!

This is me and Emily. I probably stayed on the tube longer with her than Katie but I definitely laughed more with Katie. Katie was already on the tube and I was trying to get on and I flipped the tube over on both of us. I was laughing so hard that I sucked so much water in my nose it took forever for me to get all the water out of my head!! I'll just say one more time....WE HAD SO MUCH FUN!! We will definitely make this an annual event for our High School students.

I'm Back!!!

2009-06-25T11:55:00.000-07:00

Okay...I know it has been a little while...maybe a long while since I have put anything on here but I am back. Ashby is taking a nap and I have a new laptop so I am back in business. Sorry to all three of my followers for not updating this in a while (lol). I will try to start blogging at least once a week (more often if I can)! Hope you enjoy what is going on in our thrilling life :)

Thanksgiving Day at the Croswell's

2008-11-28T07:19:00.000-08:00

Can you believe it is already Thanksgiving? At the beginning of the week I thought I was not going to get to enjoy all of our family and all of the great Thanksgiving food but thank God I am better and I got to eat turkey and dressing!! We got to Valley View at about 5:30pm on Tuesday evening. Ashby was so excited to see her cousints (that's what Jude calls Boomer and Ashby) and they were excited to see her. Everyone started talking about what they were going to cook on Thursday and it all sounded so good. When we woke up Thursday morning I was so hungry. Since I had not been feeling good I hadn't gotten to eat very much so all I could think about was food! It all turned out great! Michael made the dressing and gravy, Steve cut up everything for the cranberry salad, Tracie mashed the potaoes, Mamoo made the peas, and Susan made the corn casserole (with butter :>)! Papoo was unable to sit up and eat with us so we all went back and said the blessing with him in his room. Susan and Tracie took their food back and ate with him. Ashby loved the potatoes and the peas. She ate a whole plate full so I guess that meant she thought they were awesome! We are all so thankful for our family! I am so proud to be part of the Croswell family. I don't think there could have been a better family to marry into! The one thing I missed a lot about this year was my family. I missed getting to eat Aunt Phyllis' dressing, Granny's mashed potatoes, Aunt Barbara's mac and cheese, Aunt Neda's green bean casserole, Aunt Jeanie's chocolate chip cookies, and my mom's broccoli casserole and bread, but I am thankful that they were all able to be together.
I know most of you are probably wondering...."I wonder how she is doing emotionally?" Well, Thanksgiving was hard but I was glad we could be with Papoo. I thought about Boomer all day long...his first Thanksgiving when he ate dressing, and broccoli casserole, and mashed potatoes and peas and cornbread, and how much he loved looking at tree lights (christmas lights) and how he should be running around playing with Alex and Jude! But, he's not here and he had a way better Thanksgiving than we could ever imagine! I just keep reminding myself that God knows more than me and whether I like it or not the way things are is the way he planned it to be. I know there will only be a certain number of Thanksgivings to come that he will not be here but there will be an infinite number of Thanksgivings that we will spend together in heaven.
I hope that everyone had a wonderful Thanksgiving! Don't forget to cherish every moment you have with your family because you don't know how many moments you have left with them.
I hope this finds everyone having a wonderful day....until next time...

Josh's 30th Birthday!

2008-11-28T07:06:00.000-08:00

For the past three years I have been hearing..."Christina, I am almost 30!!!" So I thought what a better way to bring in the BIG 30 for Josh than to have a surprise party with some of our closest friends! The planning started about 2 months before the party. I wanted to make sure everything was just right. My mom made the cake, I took care of decorations (with help from Prissy, Brandi, Tara, Larry, and Stacey...thanks for making the streamers look awesome), and my brother grilled all the hamburgers! There were a couple of times when I thought it was not going to happen. I also thought that he already knew what was going on but everything was perfect. Since we are right in the middle of hunting season in East Texas I figured that would be the best way to lure him away from the house. So I called our friend Tony and set up a hog hunting trip for Josh, my dad and my brother in law. They left at about 3 and that's when it all got crazy. We started running around trying to get everything ready. With my mom, my sister, and some friends we got it all done pretty quick. By 5:30 everyone was at the house...cars hidden and being very quiet waiting on the right moment to scream...SURPRISE!!!!! He got there at about 6 and he was totally surprised. Everything went as planned and the party was a success. We had such a great time with all of our friends and family. Thanks to everyone who spent the evening with us celebrating Josh reaching a milestone!

Bird Bath or Water Bowl???

2008-10-22T15:13:00.000-07:00

One of our friends from church called on Tuesday and said she was going out of town and needed a dog sitter. Of course we said, "YES YES YES!!!" Most of you know we love animals, but this dog is special. She is one of Boone's puppies!! Her name is Millie. She came over yesterday at about 4 and she will be going home pretty soon so we had to cram in as much fun as we could.

I wasn't sure if I could do it or not, but I decided to take them both on a walk! We only walked about a mile but we had a great time!

Then I just let the dogs play in the back yard for a while and they had a blast. After about an hour we were all worn out...even Ashby!!

I hope this finds you having a wonderful day... Until next time...

FALL!!!

2008-10-22T11:42:00.000-07:00

It is finally feeling like fall! Don't you just love fall? I do. It is definitely my favorite time of year. The leaves are falling, the air is getting a little cooler, the nights are beautiful, and it brings back great memories of hayrides and "brush piles" and weeny roasts!
Every year I like to decorate my front porch with hay, scarecrows, pumpkins and mums and whatever else I can think of that looks like fall. The past two years I have taken pictures of Boomer sitting on the hay and they have turned out so cute.

So of course we couldn't have pictures of him this year by the hay so I took lots of pictures of Ashby! She did such a good job sitting up there like a big girl (with some help from PopPop).

These are just a few of the pictures that I took this year and some from years past. I hope you enjoyed looking at them as much as I did.
I hope this finds you having a wonderful day... Until next time...

Grandma's 90th Birthday!!!

2008-10-22T11:21:00.000-07:00

My Grandma turned 90 on the 13th of this month and we had a huge party at the nursing home!

All of my dad's brothers and sisters that are still here were there and a lot of their kids.

I was unable to get a lot of pictures because I ran out of space on my camera, but the ones that I did get were pretty good. I hope you enjoy them.

My Grandma has been one of the biggest Christian influences in my life. I will never forget the times we would go and see her and she always had sugar cookies in the cookie jar just waiting on us to come and eat them up. When we would go over to her house (usually every Wednesday to cook dinner for her) the first thing my brother and I would do is go straight to the kitchen and check to see if there were any cookies. Most of the time we were not disappointed. The few times that we were we knew that Grandma was just getting a little tired and didn't have the energy to make them. One memory that I will always have of my Grandma is from one time when we visited her in the nursing home...
She lived in the nursing home in Troup for a while until she moved to the one she is in now. She loved it because she was always playing bingo or getting her nails or hair done. She has lots of friends there and many who have already received the ultimate healing and are in heaven. When we went Josh would take his guitar (sometimes) because one of her fravorite things is listening to her kids and grandkids sing. That particular night we only sang a few songs and we could tell she was getting tired so we decided to go ahead and leave. We all said our goodbyes and gave her hugs and kisses and made our way out the door. As we were walking down the hall I remember that I had moved her "grabber" (her extended arm that helps her reach just about anything without getting out of her chair) so I turned around to go put it back in it's normal place. When I got to the door I realized that she had her head bowed and she was praying. As I got a little closer I realized that she was praying for our family....
I will never forget the things that she has taught me and the things that she continues to teach me.
I hope that you have someone in your life who you can look up to like I look up to my Grandma! I hope this finds you having a wonderful day... Until next time...

Girls Night "In"

2008-10-04T13:32:00.000-07:00

Man did we have fun last night. At about 5:45pm my doorbell rang and Kali went crazy. The first of my visitors had arrived. By 6:15 there were sounds of talking and laughter ringing out that I'm pretty sure you could hear all over our neighborhood. The Junior High girls d-team's "girls night in" was underway.

We had cheese dip and chips, brownies, pizza, a movie and manicures and pedicures all lined out.
First we started with the snacks. I truly believe that if you can make a girl comfortable with food you are going to have a lot of fun.

I made queso and brownies (which turned out yummy) and we ordered pizza from a new place in town called Milano's.

Brandi, Jaime and Heather came over to do toes and fingers and Raven Simone was the entertainment.
Overall the girls had a great time. They all left full, tired and with really cute finger nails and toe nails. I can't wait until we do another girls night!!

How do you really know what it is that God wants you to do with your life? I have asked myself this questions many times in my life. That's when I think about were do I fit in the most. For me the answer is when I am hanging out with a bunch of teenage girls! I can only think of a couple of things where I would have had as much fun as I did last night. If I can make a difference in a girls life by letting her come over and hang out at my house for just a little bit, then I will do that for the rest of my life.

Thank you God for allowing me to work for you!!
I hope this finds you having a wonderful day...until next time...

What do you think...

2008-10-01T13:01:00.000-07:00

Have you ever wondered about things that little kids can see that we can't? Or can they see things that we can't? I'm not sure, but I will explain what brings this question up...feel free to comment and let me know what you think.
Last night we had a home group bible study at our house which we do every Tuesday night with some friends from church. Everyone left by about 9 except for one guy (Jason). I was trying to get our little night owl to sleep so he just hung out for a while and talked with Josh and I. At about 10 he decided he would go, so Josh stepped outside with him while I was still rocking away in my recliner. Ashby was almost asleep when all of a sudden she looked up and started grinning. Remember it was just me and her in the house...
She looked over beside Josh's chair and started giggling. It was so cute that I couldn't help but laugh with her. She did that for about a minute and then she started looking right above my head. She never looked at me which was kind of weird because usually she laughs when someone is trying to get her to laugh. When she was looking above my head and she started giggling again I automatically started to cry. She could have just been thinking about something funny or picturing some silly face in her mind, but it hit me at that moment that maybe she was seeing Boomer and he was playing with her. Now...don't start thinking..."she has lost her mind!" I have no idea if that can even happen or if it did, but whatever it was, was really cool. And I guess if I want to believe that it was her brother playing peek-a-boo with her then that's okay too.
When Josh came back in I asked him what he thought about it and he said, "Do you really think God would let Boomer come back here to play with his sister?" I told him I didn't know, but that I did know that Ashby was smiling at something and there was nothing there!
So...what do you think...does God allow kids to see things that adults don't see or was it just gas?
I hope this finds you having a wonderful day...until next time...

What is she doing now?

2008-09-26T08:55:00.000-07:00

Ashby is growing so much everyday! Some of her favorite things to do right now are: drool, crawl, drool, stick out her tongue, drool, talk to her daddy, and did I say drool!!

She started sitting up a week before she was 6 months old and on the day of her 6 month birthday she started crawling!! It is really hard to believe she is doing all of this stuff, because for those of you who knew Boomer at this age, he just wasn't doing much. Oh, and did I mention she weighs 20 lbs. and is 28 inches long? We're hoping for a softball player!!

She started eating green beans this week and she seems to like them a lot. When we got finished I don't know who had more on them, me or her. She is a really messy eater. Hopefully, as she gets older, she will grow out of that.

Her hair is almost long enough for a pony tail. You can barely see this one, but it is sticking up right in the front. Does she look like her Mamoo or what!!!

She loves her daddy so much. When I try to get her to talk to me she won't hardly make a sound. He can hold her up in front of him and say, "tell me all your secrets," and she will sit and talk to him forever. I am almost sure she said, "I love you," to him a few nights ago.

I was always worried that, when Ashby got older and could understand everything that happened the day that we brought her home from the hospital, she would think it was her fault in some way. But, as we are progressing through the grieving process I am realizing more and more each day that she was a true blessing from God because he already knew what was going to happen that day. It's almost like he was telling us, "I'm sorry that I have to take Boomer, so her is a little blessing to get you through the hardest time of your life." I don't know if that is actually how it works, but it helps me. If it wasn't for Ashby I know there would be days where I would just curl back up and go to sleep and stay in bed all day. She is what has pulled me through this whether I wanted her to or not. I know that God knew just what I needed and he gave it to me because he is so gracious!
I hope this finds you having a wonderful day...until next time...

Revolve Tour!!!

2008-09-21T20:50:00.001-07:00

REVOLVE TOUR

This weekend I took a group of girls (plus 3 women) to the Revolve Tour in Dallas. For any of you that don't know what that is...it is a weekend conference just for girls that focuses on stuff just for girls.

Mrs. Susan and Mrs. Heather were two of the women that got to go with us.
I get really excited about taking girls to conferences like this one. They get to take time to hang out with just girls and get told frequently how awesome they are. I'm pretty sure some of the girls that we took with us are not told that frequently enough!!

Mrs. Kristy was our brave bus driver...she was awesome. None of the trips that I plan would be possible without people like Kristy. She is an awesome youth leader and I am very glad that she lets us use her so much.

Sarah, Katie and Emily are some of our high school students. They are so awesome. Katie and Sarah missed their homecoming and Emily missed getting to be in the band just so they could come to revolve. I am so glad that they made the sacrifice because I really think God showed them some great stuff this weekend.

Not only did we take a great group of girls from our church but we got to meet two of my favorite girls in the whole world from Oklahoma. Kirsten and Polly drove from Lawton so they could be with us at the conference. I miss them so much. I wish they could just come and stay with us for a while. Getting to see them was like icing on the cake!

This weekend was a great experience for the girls, but it was also a great experience for me. When Jenna Lucado talked about letting God have all access to your heart she was speaking directly to me. I have been blocking God from having the access that he desires from me because I have been angry with him. Yes... I said it... I have been angry with him. When I first realized I was angry with my Creator I thought there was something wrong with me... that I shouldn't feel that way. But then I realized something...if I can be angry with God, that shows that I truly believe he is real. How many relationships do you have where you never get upset or angry with that person? NONE!!
So, is it okay to be angry with God? That is up to you to decide, but for me the answer is yes. This helps me to understand that my relationship with him is real and can withstand anything.
Boomer dying was the worst thing that has ever happened to me, but God has been here through it all. It has made my relationship him more real than it has ever been before and I am thankful for that.
Remember to thank God for the things that he does that you like, and thank him for the things that he does that you don't like, because he knows what your big picture looks like and all you are getting is a glimpse at the first strokes.
Thanks God for an AWESOME weekend :)

Another beautiful day!

2008-09-16T21:07:00.000-07:00

Well, today was just another beautiful day.
Ashby has not been feeling very good the past week so at 1 a.m. I decided it was time to call the doctor. At 9:30 I called and they had an opening at 11 so we got ready as quick as we could and headed off to Longview. We waited in the doctor's office for about 30 minutes and they finally called us back. She weighs 18 pounds and is almost 28 inches long. He checked her ears and much to my surprise...no ear infection. I guess it is a good thing I'm not a doctor because I definitely would have screwed that one up! He checked her nose...seems to look good. Then he checked her throat...not so good. She has something that sounds like laryngitis. He said that her throat was red and swollen and had ulcers on it. Fortunatly he said that it has almost run it's course and all we have to do is continue to give her tylenol.
After the doctor we took my Granny back to Overton. Then we went to Arp and back to Daingerfield.
To most people the blog for today would be pretty boring and some may be wondering why would she write about taking her daughter to the doctor...this is my world and if you want to know about me this is what I do. Even if it is not the most eventful life, it is my life and I enjoy everyday that I get to spend with my family which is exactly what I did today.
I hope this finds you having a wonderful day...until next time...

We still have "evacuees"

2008-09-15T21:31:00.000-07:00

Well...it is Monday after the storm on Saturday and there are still some people in our area that have no power. My mom and my Granny are staying with us for the second night because they live in a place were it is not that important to have electricity. Since they live in the country they will be some of the last to have their power lines worked on.
I am very thankful that we still have power so that they could come and stay with us. We still haven't played any games but hopefully all of that fun will come tomorrow.
As for me today...I have had a wonderful day. Thoughts of Boomer fill my mind ever minute of every day, but now most of my thoughts are of great memories that we shared with him instead of the memory of "that day."
As for Ashby...she is sitting up pretty good on her own and moving (not crawling) all over the living room floor. She is rubbing everything on her gums so I really think she will be getting a tooth soon. She is also rubbing her ears a lot so I think that is the result of an ear infection. Listen to me...Dr. Croswell. Wouldn't that be nice, then I wouldn't have to go to the doctor tomorrow and pay $20 for him to tell me...it looks like she has an ear infection.
Well, it is getting late and Josh is already in bed so I guess I better go for now. I hope this finds you having a wonderful day.
Until next time...

So...how are you doing?

2008-09-14T17:22:00.000-07:00

So...how are you doing? I am asked this question many times a day by various people. Sometimes I want to say, "How do you think I'm doing,"although I am very glad that people care. There are days when I just want to curl up in bed and never get up and then there are days when I want to get out of the house and stay busy all day. I never know what kind of day it will be when I get up in the morning, but I do know that because I believe in such a BIG GOD it will be a day that I will manage to get through and usually enjoy.
I will try in this blog to tell people how we are doing, milestones that ashby has reached, and what is going on in my small life.
If you ever catch yourself wondering, "How are the Croswell's doing today," just log on to my blog and maybe I can give you a glimpse of what it is like to have a small life but a BIG GOD.